Love the warmer weather
and how it makes me feel.
Frustrated with not knowing what to do with a certain kid
(well really, more than one certain kid)
and not knowing exactly how much to push
and how much to hold back
because yes, somethings are beyond his control
and he is struggling so much
but somethings he is capable of doing so much more.
Excited to be able to go see Hunger Games tomorrow!
Frustrated in not being able to go work out
and needing the energy and will to do something more
(although I am up to 40 sit ups and push ups).
Heartbroken to see him struggle to even order his food
with a panicked look and confused silence,
pleading for help.
So very grateful that I am home to "take care of things"
and that I don't have to work outside the home.
Wanting and needing to go out on a date with just the two of us.
Happy to see little hand prints on a window
and thinking of never washing that window again.
Feeling overwhelmed at times
and knowing it could be worse
(and being grateful that it isn't).
Feeling more than fine at times
and knowing it's all just a part of my life
(and knowing that is how life goes sometimes).
What lies behind us and what lies before us
are tiny matters compared to
what lies within us.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson
Hoping what lies within me is enough.